Humble Reflections

KEEPING THE COLLECTION OF MY THOUGHTS

I was so depressed for three days because I am so bored where we live. Sure, there are so many places to see and scenic spots which are so nice to see but, I think I was looking for something else. I don't know what it was but, it seems I am missing something. So, I lay awake at night speaking to God to give me something that my heart desire.

I was planning to attend the mass last Sunday but, I was lazy again and the depression took over my senses. I ask God, I need a life that I wanted. I need something that will occupy my time and at the same time earn for a living. I wanted to work to have my own financial freedom. I have so many plans in life but, all was put on hold for 18 months.

Sunday, I was mumbling while sleeping. My husband had to wake me up. Little did he know, I was mumbling in my sleep as I talk to God. I call it prayer.

Monday came, my phone rang at dawn time. A call for a job interview. Isn't it amazing how God works in a mysterious way? He used that man as an instrument. As I recalled the incident, God must have a sense of humor too. I thought I was dreaming again when I answered the phone at 4:30 in the morning. Plus, my interview was set at 11:30 in the evening. Weird? Nope! I call it humor.

Sometimes, God had to measure our temperament to know how sincere we are with our demands. If I loose my temper to that man calling me so early then, I am not at all sincere to my prayer. Yes! I got a job. God answers prayer and God is really good.

I am already almost two years here in the US but, I only meet one Filipino. I met her in Orlando when me and hubby went to a Pizza Restaurant and from then on, we communicate through cellphone. Thereare times that I invited her to our party and we go malling. It is really nice to see your Kababayan in a foreign land. It is so good to hang out with someone we can mingle with all the "kalokohan" LOL. Today, I went to Walmart and I was so glad that I found another Filipino. She works as a cashier. Well, I hope I can mingle with her and get to know her more.

When I arrived in the US, I was overwhelmed with sadness especially when my husband left for work and I have to stay home alone. Every morning and evening, I talked to my family in the Philippines. After that, I am alone in the house. All I did was watch TV and listen to the music. I also surf the internet about anything. But then, boredome fills my world because I am used to having friends and stay at the mall after work. I realized that too much of everything is tiring. When I work 8 hours and arrived so exhausted, I wished for relaxation. I thought that having a time for myself to just stay in the bed would be more nicer. I was wrong. After 2 months, I did wish to have that tiring job than stay at home. Will my husband permit me?

Since I woke up, I have my meals beside my PC. This is my first time that I never went out my room. I have my fridge in my bedroom and my cappuccino maker so, what else do I need? Nothing! Besides, its weekend and I have time to surf the net. Nothing to say for now but, hopefully tomorrow, my imaginations will bring me to issues to tackle. Until then.

What are the qualities of a mother? A mother is nurturing, gentle, protective, compassionate, understanding, supportive and most of all loving. These are the attributes of a mother. Are these descriptions enough? If this is true then, anyone can be a mother. But wait, a mother can also be these: good listener, patient, humble, guiding light, source of strength, good and always think of the good for the children. All the positive adjectives will surely fit to define a mother. I am so blessed to have my mother. She has these qualities too.


What are the qualities of a mother? Cory Aquino. That will be my answer. That is my short and concise description of a mother. Why?

When I was in 5th grade, the father of my close classmate was murdered. They are 8 children in the family and their father left them a bakery and jeepney business. The family cried rivers for their loss and the mother suffered from depression. Because of that depression, she mismanaged their business and they go bankrupt.

Cory Aquino lost her husband and what makes it harder was the corrupt government was the enemy. If she was just an ordinary woman, she would dive into depression too. But, because of her motherly instinct, she stood on her ground. A mother should be the source of strength and hope for her children. Cory Aquino proven that she needs to be strong to make the family survive.

When she was diagnosed of having a cancer, she never asks God why? In fact, we saw the milestones of her life as a devotee of Mama Mary. Her faith of God was never shaken. She prays the rosary until the last breath of her life. Her patience is very admirable and that what makes her the mother of the nation.

I am compelled to post this photo because I like it. We see a silhouette of a person only. We have this silhouette in us. There are times in our lives that we want to hide with in our shadow. It is better this way; nobody will judge us, right? People will see us in a passive way. But, life is not like that. We have to mingle and belong.


If we want others to accept us, we have to blend with them. Keep up with them. But, the choice of group that we wanted to belong can be a good one or can shift our lives in a negative path. We have our choices and it's up to you which path to take.

Was there a time in our lives that because of our arrogance, we judged the person according to the physical aspect and the wrong choices they make? Sometimes, we are judgmental as if we are righteous. We should sometimes consider that they are human and vulnerable to feel pain.

Behind the shadow of every person, there lies the true self. No matter how we dressed up good or pretend that we are okay or superior to anyone around, in the darkness, we have fears. The fear of rejection, the feeling of loneliness and we wanted to avoid these.

Either way, behind the shadow of our being, we should not forget that acceptance is the key to happiness. Be contented of what you have. If you feel rejection from others, accept it and move on. If others don't want you in, don't push yourself. On the other side of the coin, don't judge the person according to their physical attributes. Give importance of the character of a person. That is the key to win a friend and to belong.


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